Posts Tagged ‘loss’

Stop the ride, I want off the roller coaster!!!

Monday, November 30th, 2009

The title about sums it up. I need to get off of the ride. However, there is NO way to get off the roller coaster of life. You just have to go with the flow and make the best of it.

I am in the midst of grieving a loss that I can not understand. I don’t think I will ever understand the will of God in this situation. I can not be strong like others and say “why not me” all I can say is “why me?”

I feel like a cursed woman. To live with infertility for years is hell. To live after miscarriage is hell. To live after miscarriage and have several friends and family members announce that they are expecting is even a greater hell to live through. I know it is not their fault that my body does not work right, but my goodness wait a few days to make your announcements. Its been less than a week since my loss and I am expected to jump up and down and tell you how happy for you I am. Well I CAN NOT do that. Let me move on a little before you flaunt your happiness. Show me a little compassion.

Remember just because I can not be happy with you does not mean I am not happy for you. Give me time and eventually I will be happy with you.