Recently I was at a baby shower and the conversation turned to child birth. One of the ladies asked me about Madilyn and how I was able to get back to work so soon after her birth. Madilyn was just over two weeks old when I started my current job. Her arrival was very unexpected and I had just gotten a new job, so it was impossible to take any time off. Lucky for me David was able to be home with her. Since most of the people in the room knew she was adopted I let this co-worker in on the not so secret, secret. Her first response was, “but she’s so pretty and smart who would want to give her away?”
It is unfortunate that this was not the first time I had heard this comment. Its as if some people think that those who place children for adoption look at a baby and say, “this one is ugly, guess I will give her away.” I guess all of the other adopted children they have come across have been ugly. These types of comments make me wonder how in the world some people function in civilized society. It is frustrating to hear people talk about adopted children in this way. Comments like this one insinuate that something must be wrong with children who are placed for adoption, since they were “given away.”
It is hard to do but I have to keep reminding myself that some people will just never get that adoption stereotypes are wrong and do more harm than good. Madilyn is a beautiful girl on the inside and out, and is loved very much.
Unfortunately, I’m sure many Down’s Syndrome babies have been aborted, affirming the falacy that only smart children are worthy of life. Sadly, there is sometimes a bias favoring pretty and smart. I’m glad that God loves every child and I pray that I would never be guilty of this or any prejudice.