Stupid Questions Airport Security People Ask.

I almost laughed when the security agent at the gate to my flight from London asked me, “Do you have anything in your bag that could be used weapon?” What kind of stupid question is that? Is there a right answer to that question? The following is a list of items in my bag that could be used as a weapon but I was permitted to board with all of these dangerous items.

  1. Laptop: I felt like using it to whack the guy in front of me over the head because he insisted on changing the position of his seat every five minutes. I was trying to watch a movie and my screen kept moving.
  2. Laptop Power cord: I could have strangled someone on the plane with that cord.
  3. Make-up brush: The brush has a sharp point and I could have poked some one’s eye out with it.
  4. Eye drops: Eye drops have been shown to be a very dangerous drug if placed in some one’s drink. I could have drugged my row mates with those dangerous drugs.
  5. College Textbook: I could have bored everyone on the plane to death by reading the darn book. Or I could have thrown it and knocked someone out with it.
  6. Back pack: The straps could have been used to choke someone.
  7. Ink Pen: I can not take a nail file on board but I can take an ink pen, I could have stabbed someone with my ink pen.
  8. Compact Mirror: I could have broke this and then sliced some one’s throat.
I am sure that I had other items in my bag that could have been used as a weapon. I hope you all feel safe, I know I do thanks to airport security. What a freaking JOKE.

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