Consumed– Devotional

Joyce Myer once said, “Never use your problems for as an excuse for bad attitudes or behavior.”  It is easy to use what is going on in our lives as an excuse to act poorly,  have a bad attitude, or to be consumed with jealously.

Verse:  We should live decently, as people who live in the light of day. Wild parties, drunkenness, sexual immorality, promiscuity, rivalry, and jealousy cannot be part of our lives. Instead, live like the Lord Jesus Christ did, and forget about satisfying the desires of your sinful nature (Romans 13:13-14).

Living as Christ desires us to lives means not making excuses for our behavior.  While I do not go to wild parties, get drunk, participate in sexual sin, promiscuity, or rivalry I am GUILTY of jealousy.  While I know that sin is sin it is hard to believe that jealousy is listed along with all of the other sins that seem to be far worse.  However when you look at the big picture it is easy to see that jealousy can creep into your life a little at a time and  become a powerful force that controls you from the inside out.

Normally, I am not a jealous person.  I do not get jealous over money, status, promotions, beauty or any other material thing.  I am jealous of fertility and the ability people have to easily have child after child. I am  jealous of any woman who has never had to suffer the pain of miscarriage and infertility. Don’t misread me. I am not saying I want people to suffer as I have suffered.  I am saying that I wish I could be like them.  I wish I could unjoin the so called “club.”  At times my jealously turns to anger and in my anger I say and do things that I am ashamed to even admit.

My favorite excuse to justify my jealousy is “If you have never suffered from miscarriage or infertility you can not really imagine how it feels ”  While the statement may be true  it does not justify my being jealous.  I have been jealous of others and have let jealously consume me. My jealously has affected my family, my professional life, my relationships with others and my relationship with God.

During the past several weeks I have facing reality, coping and dealing with my life as it has been given to me.  While it is not an easy task I am taking time to examine my feelings of jealousy and taking steps to remove these feelings from my life. I still reflect on what I wanted for my family, but now I try to do it without letting jealousy creep into my thoughts and actions.

One Response to “Consumed– Devotional”

  1. Niki Boggs says:

    Very proud of you!! I had to face my big demons about a year and a half ago and soooooo glad I did! I’ve never been regretful of facing them but always regretful about not doing it sooner!

    Awesome post!